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4/10/2011

Confessions

Confession time: I'm good at lying.

BUT. Only when I know I have a good reason to do so. For example, yesterday, when I schemed a surprise for my mom's birthday. It was a good plan, and it involved lots of lying--er, acting. I have included it below.

The Plan:
  1. Tell Mom that you and your sister are going to the school play, and that you have to be there at 6:30. (Pro Tip: Having the internet crash is helpful so she can't check the website and find out the play actually starts at 8:00.)
  2. Stop her from making dinner, a process involving complaining about "polenta pie" enough that she huffily gets out a frozen pizza instead.
  3. Convince her to go for a run in the half hour before you have to leave.
  4. While she is on the run, take the pizza out of the oven and hide a piece to make it look like you and your sister ate already.
  5. Upon her return, convince Mom to change into a nicer shirt so she doesn't "embarrass you" at the school because (!) you're driving and she'll have to get out to get in the driver's seat once you're there.
  6. Hustle her out the door before she can take more than a few bites of pizza.
  7. Make wrong turn onto main road. Say, "Oh my gosh, I thought I was going to Jael's."
  8. At next intersection, pretend to not know your way around your hometown and make another wrong turn.
  9. Have your mother not sure whether to laugh or cry in the backseat. (Hopefully she chooses "laugh")
  10. Make final wrong turn. Pretend to freak out and say, "I'll just pull in here and turn around."
  11. Pull into really yummy restaurant where you have 6:30 reservations.
  12. Get out of car.
  13. Enjoy total confusion and shock on mother's face.
  14. Have a lovely dinner.
Second confession: It was FUN.

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